Finding the Pause

Tough. Crazy. Unpredictable. Weird times.

As I write this at the dining room table, I’m also simultaneously homeschooling my children, organizing my grocery list for the next 2-4 weeks and trying to keep our home front running smoothly for everyone quarantining in our 1400 sq ft home. And, really just trying to hold it together during this uncertain time. Anyone else?

As a yogini, I have wanted to stay connected to my own practice and as a teacher to offer that out to others to stay connected to theirs. I hear about some having more space and time to practice and meditate and pause. As a mother and a householder I feel the pause in different ways. We are all together all the time. All the time. Did I mention all the time? We have some semblance of a schedule that incorporates the kids and my live classes, recording times and commitments, and trying to leave room in our days for being, exploring and rest.

Each day, I incorporate time for my own practice, where I can connect, remember and drop back into the ground of my being. And, for that I am SO grateful. It’s precisely how I am able to hold it together. How are you holding it together?

And, with the pause, rest and space as a family so many beautiful things have risen to the surface. My garden is teeming with seedlings bursting through the ground. I have a first hand view of how the boys are really doing in school-like really really. Which has reduced my need to want them to do more math and reading. Yesterday, homeschooling was how to clean the toilets and wash the car. It’s brought tears to my eyes many, many times on how the boys are bonding: new brother handshakes, hours jumping on the trampoline, inside secrets, playing games, and just sweet moments together hanging out. We are also now a small part of my husbands assembly line at work and love being able to support him.

So, I’ve been pondering what it is to Pause. Rest. Slow down. What that can mean to each of us? How do are we each able to find this in our own way through this? And, why this is so very important right now?

It would have been nice to be able to slow down gradually. Rather than come to such a sudden halt. Maybe that would have been easier? Or maybe just as hard. Because let’s be honest, we’ve been pretty darn busy. It seems we have been almost addicted to busyness. How are you? Busy. How are you? Busy. Almost making ourselves feel less than if we weren’t busy. Rarely have we stopped to pause. Make space to see what comes up. To sit with _______. But perhaps this was necessary for each of us to slow down enough so that we could connect back into a resource within us and all around us that is all pervasive and unending.

So, in the small moments of our day it’s when we get up in the morning or when we are doing the dishes or sitting in meditation it’s valuable to connect to this eternal time. If we look at the virus, it’s a small part of BIG time that the yogis have always looked at. David Ingersoll wrote, “In the presence of eternity, the mountains are as transient as the clouds.” And, this suggests that all things are transient. So maybe if we come back to this presence of eternity and pause, then a great sense of space opens up for us.

In our busyness we’ve been eating fast food, driving fast on highways and rushing through bustling cities, and jammed outlook calendars, even in speeding up in our yoga practices. So, this time of isolation maybe a call for letting the pause be profound in our lives individually and collectively.

For me, it helps to let go of how it will work out. And, this then requires a lot of trust. That we recognize the pause in between day and night. Inhale and exhale. Pause in our digestion. That maybe we don’t eat as much. Pause with our family members-that we really listen. Can we let the pause come in?

Also, to let things really come in. To absorb them. When we are moving so quickly, we have trouble really absorbing. The moments almost slip off our skin and don’t really sink in. So, now as our velocity slows, and we are almost idling, how can we let the pause work for us? How can we be the pause? Can we find the stillness in the activity we are in? Rest in action. Being in doing. Iyengar said to find the repose in the pose. Stillness in cooking. Slowing down in biking or walking. Finding the pause.

This is where the juice or the Shakti lives. Find the Shakti of the pause. Allow the Shakti to rise up in the moment. If we can slow down enough. To decelerate enough. We can allow the spin of time to move through us. We can connect to this vital energy.

This time can be like a battery charge for us. Maybe we can allow our energy reserves – our Prana – to fill back up. And, can we absorb? Soak in? How can we amp up our own storage so that when we do jump back into the speed vortex again that we are connected, grounded, rested and have a sense of the eternal that the mountains suggest?

So, I hope we can connect to in the practices and pause together. May each of us learn to trust it’s good work? Silence. Stillness. No thought. Spaciousness. Opening up to possibility.

I’m here right alongside you through this,

With love and gratitude,